41-This number sounds so large yet in number of days one can hardly believe that they have gone like an eye blink. I almost retrieve myself and begin to contemplate the feeling of having 41 days to almost be free to schedule work, family and life admin to wholly myself. It has taking me some time for this to sink in as an everyday reality and while grasping for scrap of paper on a continuous basis to organise time minute by minute, hour by hour it quickly dawned upon me that these days are probably one of the few times in the entirety of my life that I have completely felt most breathable, tranquil, peaceful and soulful.
I have many times caught myself just staring at the window allowing for the first time in a very long time my brain to just freely wander off, playfully tossing ideas, remembering previous life happenings, experiences which I have long forgotten, places and faces I have visited and seen, vividly hidden behind my cortex. But yet and yet again as often happens my mind stops at the sound of the laughter of children on a hot summer day in a park, whatever the hidden meaning of this is, nevertheless the familiarity of this gives me an immense inner settlement. How can it be that not long ago I was in a constant chasing state, my mind was entirely encapsulated with more to do list, daunting career progression decisions, financial decisions, and the entirety of the idealism of chasing that “prosperous life” whatever this means.
I am almost flabbergasted at the understanding that it has taken me 41-days for these idealisms to quieten down and almost become dust until resurrected again. It took a physically enforced national quietude to finally escape the madness and let this outer quietude simmer towards my soul. I however find myself challenging my own self of why it had to struggle with letting this quietude in amidst the outer hustle and bustle, amidst every day’s trials and tribulations and amidst the outer rashness. Perhaps, the blessing that I can foresee is to take this time on my stride and establish inner-armours that can somehow protect this inner tranquillity that this time has enabled me to taste. That my reader is my challenge going forward when the outer veils are lifted and when we reappear to our hustle and bustle again, not forgetting the to-do-list, which will be dusted off; my question will remain of whether my experienced secluded soul will survive undisturbed.
About the Author: